Every decision we make is influenced by our subconscious cognitive distortions. They force us to make hasty judgments based on inaccurate information, to be unfair and to waste our time. As soon as we begin to realize that we have these prejudices, we will be able to change your mind and accept reality for what it is.
All or nothing thinking
All or nothing thinking this type of thinking is characterized by a tendency to view things in extremes either good or bad.This applies to ourselves other people events and situations.Is sometimes referred to as black or white thinking there are no shades of gray or any middle ground for this kind of thinking.
For example either I am getting promoted this year or I have wasted all of my time in this company.Another example this one is very common and I’m sure many of you do it often been noticed.Either I lose 10 pounds in a month or this exercise regime is a complete waste of time. Familiar right.Me too.All right.
If we do not win the Masters I’m never going to watch the match again.This is a very common one.Again we do it for all the match lovers.I call this a rigid style of thinking and cause a lot of psychological stress.
It can go on to be to a lot of anxiety maybe people with perfectionist type of tendency must think in this way and the high standards and goals that they set for themselves often spill over into all aspects of their lives.
It is all or nothing thinking dominance a person’s accomplishments and everyday experiences never live up to.And we have high standards they have set for themselves.The result is inevitable reduction in self esteem as a person experiences and negative self image.This is negative effects behavior and it may lead to the person avoiding situations.
Therefore if you are perfectionist although I’m not telling is not good to be a perfectionist ,but you should consider being a little easier on yourself.I will tell you my story.I was a perfectionist from all aspects and one more back to my self that good.
I used to take some projects and keep working on them and the more I worked on them the more I wanted to make it perfect.Less did I know that nothing can be perfect no matter what I do as there will definitely be someone somewhere who is probably better than me.
I used to take ages to complete task or for that matter.I left many incomplete as well because I was not able to make it perfect had it done reduces my self-esteem.Then I attended a workshop by my mentor.
I learned about what was the problem of being a perfectionist rather than all good factorise about it.I learned it’s important to finish a task then be hundred percent perfect because finishing will increase my self-esteem and will result in better poets.
Always remember that for our kind of people. so called perfectionist is important to finish the task .because no matter how perfect it looks to you trust me it is better than 90 percent of people who doesn’t have this perfectionist behavioral attitude. so go for it and never think negative about yourself.
You are worthy of what ever you deserve or you are worthy to create happiness for yourself.Know it for yourself stand up for yourself and go for it.You can do it.I have done.I you are you will do it.
Blaming and Filtering
Maybe I like the previous thinkingness orphans that is personalizing. this type of thinking is the total opposite in this is always the fault of the other person.Circumstances are for that matter.The whole world that something has happened or whatever problem has occurred as a victim of the situation.
The first is energy is spent on casting for any blame rather than seeking a way to rectify or get over that particular problem.You got me going over to someone or something else.Then there is no need to analyze or painting or behavior or see whatever we may have contributed or whether we may maybe too harsh in our interpretation.
We are taking personal responsibility for example is because of him I decided to shout at my best friends.She ruined my entire day by doing this or by doing that.My manager doesn’t know how the work should be done.That’s why I get that treaty.
Except for why it’s certainly true that life presents many difficulties and undeniable pain and suffering.They often call us to blame others as the reason for one’s unhappiness is to cost oneself in the role of the victim.
There are three advantages to victim hood as finger pointing provider is convenient justification for.in light unsatisfactory conditions and shared the work necessary to take complete charge of one’s own life and well-being.However having a baby over time perpetuates bitterness resentment and powerlessness as the victim suffers from what HD call white privilege.
Those who are target of our Blame have no idea or could care less about how you feel.You only hurt yourself by being a prisoner of your own bitterness and cement your feeling may be justified but they will not help you make them happy healthy successful activity. Isn’t that what you really want.
If your life is not perfect make a life well lived for despite all the imperfection.Telling.Letting go of Blake in any way was unfair circumstances which are very real both locally and globall yor excuses.Difficult people or invalidates life’s many hardships but this is not about them.
This is about you.You do this for yourself in order to reclaim the freedom and power that is only yours.I completely understand.It may seem easy and convenient to blame others for our unhappiness but in the long run we lose out.Indulging in labor cost us the party to be in charge.
We miss the profound potential which can be unleashed once we take total responsibility for our nice experiences and preside productively over the purposeful direction of our lives.Next on the list is net defecation or filtering.This is probably one of the things we all do it intentionally or unintentionally that is making mountains out of the molehills like taking the negative and awful occurrences and magnifying them was during all of the other aliens creating a distorted picture of a particular event.
For example you organize a good conference at took down everything goes well except there is a mix up with the rooms and we had to wait for only 15 minutes before he and his wife get into their room.Consequently your perception of the event is that he didn’t trust Woody despite the keynote speech at the dinner.Big shoes success in some scenarios if majority of the people are crazy I’m not happy about your luck and the situation.
You must force your thoughts to stop thinking constructively and say to yourself over and over on and on.That is by definition heater’s which was normal and could have had happened with anyone you was because of you.The event was so successful that yourself for the things you did the best way than slapping yourself for a small mistake.
Think about it I can and do and stop doing it to yourself.Don’t blame yourself.Don’t think things don’t create the hell out of us.Create your own life for your own betterment goal of this goal from this over and over again.Challenge yourself.
Read your thoughts that know I have not what my thoughts are different and I can build on really successful and happy life for myself only by changing my thoughts which are completely in my hand.Yes your happiness is in your heart.Your happiness is what you think so.Think positive.Be happy you deserve it.Your worth.
Get to vising agency you exaggerate the consequences of an action taking effect as a catastrophic event.Situations that are perhaps unwelcome or Lijun are graded in a person’s mind as be awfully pedestrian think how anxious or stressed people are.
Prime candidate for this mode of thinking .for example something that they will be the first one to get fired when the company is thinking about for me the team is always.What kind of a scenario for such people.
It is wise to understand whenever you are experiencing such thoughts you must put a stop to it and take control of it before talking to you once again.The result will be an appropriate assessment of life’s event or circumstances resulting in the upset or in distress when the situation doesn’t warrant it.
You can imagine a situation in which you or people you know of or spend hours getting minor caresses do major transgressions.When we are just too lazy we should start thinking about either or life in general.It often leads to anger sure.
Kind of a painting is a very dangerous one so we need to keep our thoughts in check and be aware of when we are engaging in this kind of thinking.Even when we are encouraging major problems need to be made more traffic than the situation really warrants.
So next time you are making mountain out of a mall do please consider it.Please look at the situation tell yourself.Force yourself to understand that that’s not the reality.Tell yourself you might be catastrophizing.
I come out of that situation stuff that TARP rebel that part killing there so that it doesn’t destroy your mental peace doesn’t destroy your happiness your happiness is in your hand.You are the creator of created for yourself.You are worthy of it.Your.
Personalising you’re probably very familiar with this one.It’s so common and such an instinctive reaction you take the blame for things that are not necessarily your fault even though they are not under your control at all.
What somebody says or does is a direct reaction to you.Let’s understand this with an example.Imagine you work in a supermarket and you bump into someone you know she’s holding back in her hand.She looks at you see to see.Hello.Why are you holding the horses and dashes off without saying much or without talking to you.Your thoughts.
I must have done something wrong.Why did she avoided me.She is normally very chatty and she liked me.I always thought why hot pots wore these bands are so heavy.My fingers are getting numb.What a ridiculous q.I’m getting late for home.
Oh God I have to cook dinner as well.
After reaching home and sex from remember that not everything that happens is a result of our imperfections.It’s not always about us jumping to conclusions as to why somebody is not as talkative with you on a certain location as they normally are.Tell me something related to they have asked worried about something they do.
Hey the list is endless and there is no way you to know about it.
People with guns drawn and then seek to personalize with unnecessary spin on top of their native life , embroidered with feelings of hurt and good which is often unfounded and it can fracture relationships as well.
Hence you must make the choice to stop personalizing yourself for anything and everything.Give yourself a reality check.I guess you yourself just caught telling yourself that you are personalising your thoughts when there is no need of it.
You are not completely aware of the situation at the other end.So personal lives if you have the habit of taking all the blame on yourself.Personalizing yourself for anything and everything.Don’t do it now you know there is something called personalizing right so the next time you are doing it.
you are thinking it’s your fault. you are eating your mistake or you have done something wrong for which the other person behavior has changed or something so.You tell yourself that oh my god I’m personalizing.
So just drop your car up there.Stop thinking logically.Force yourself to think logically at that particular moment.Fight with your thoughts.Remember your cuts.Every time you take that you your Christianizing rebel your thoughts.I know you will emerge as a winner.
Emotional reasoning , this is a common thinking error that to force of habit you will probably find that you have been doing this automatically without a moment’s thought.What happens here is that your feelings dictate what the reality is.
Feelings become sad for you as opposed to any emotional state big experience something makes you afraid.Therefore it has to be dangerous simply because it’s something you fear.You feel guilty therefore you must have done something wrong.
We have been looking at how unhealthy part creates our feelings and emotions but our feelings also contribute to a certain line of thinking.Providing evidence for a fact for example you may experience feelings of awkwardness at work function that you are attending.
So you use this emotional response as a catalyst for deciding, that this gathering is not for you and you would rather leave all obviously emotions are important for the information they provide but they have to be interpreted you know objectively to actually understand what that means.
Emotional reasoning plays a role in almost all depressions .because things feel so negative to a depressed person such a person a human.They truly are.It doesn’t occur to them to challenge the validity of the perception that creates their feelings.One common side effect of emotional reasoning is broadcasting nation.
So they are, I was cleaning up his desk because he tells him so.I feel so lousy when I think about the messy desk cleaning it will be impossible for me six months later he finally gets himself a little boy.How does it turns out to be quite gratifying.I’m not a top dog.I don’t.
He was fooling himself all along because he had adopted the habit of letting his negative feelings guide the way he did.Robert Clay has suggested the following techniques for challenging emotional reasoning.Whenever you are feeling this kind of reasoning you can challenge your cause with these techniques.
Number one re the degree of your belief and identify and create your emotions number to identify exactly what your emotional reasoning is.For example I feel so anxious.So something bad is going to happen.No T then distinguish between emotion and fact describe the facts do yourself things that you can see or hear rather than your emotional response to them.
Try to think logically force yourself to think logically when your doctor cost benefit analysis first does rely on your emotions make you feel like you are on a roller coaster.Second do you think that your emotion protects you from and repay you for the worst part.How would your thoughts feelings and behavior change.
If you rely less on your emotions to make predictions or judgments.Any evidence for and against your use of emotional reasoning.Does the evidence support your POV that your emotions have generally been a good or bad guide to reality.Find out what cognitive distortions are you using to support your belief.
Discounting positives personalizing mind reading fortunetelling catastrophizing using negative filters use your cognitive distortions to find out which one you are using among all these kind of distorted.Think right down.How could you prove that your POV is wrong.Is it stable.
How do you test believe that your emotions already.We all do.What if your thoughts were true.Why would it bother you.What evidence would you give to of Frey who relied primarily on his or her emotions to judge the reality.So next time you are emotionally.Any person or situation do this nine step analysis to figure out the outcome of your thinking as a whole.
This will help you in your own understanding of your thoughts to help you overcome when you are emotionally resenting your cards and getting more and more distorted thinking in return.Getting depressed it’s in your hand you have the complete authority to change your own thoughts for the betterment of yourself.
Don’t believe everything your mind tell you another the distorted thinking habit is labeling this can be a dashboard description to ourselves or to others.Sure and you know what I mean you do it frequently don’t you.Before we get into the labels , it should be say that as human beings bought off are inevitable make up is that we do things that we regret.
We make mistakes fail to achieve what we go for make bad decisions.Criticize people except try to do everything in our own self-talk.When we concentrate on criticizing our behavior we are criticizing an isolated incident that has no reflection on our world as a whole person.
When we start using terms like failure loser, stupid hopeless or incompetent, it can prove to be self-fulfilling as it discourages for their activity ashes.For those thoughts.Remember actions.All those thoughts.
Remember language like this , when used about you by others or by you and your own self taught and cause, problems specially if a person is suffering from low self-esteem.This applies to other people as well as ourselves.They believe tends to trigger emotions such a shame guilt anxiety and depression as well as assigning jobs to ourselves.
Even though it is wrong to define complex persons to isolate behavior still we label other people so other people may use less inconsiderate no good except for for example the banjir I work for is a real bitch.
This may feel anger and resentment leads to a waste of precious mental and nervous energy that our interpersonal relationships.What we ought to be doing is trying to separate a person’s behavior from the person as a whole.
It’s not the character of the person that is causing us problems usually it’s our thinking about them or their certain behavior which is causing problems.Only recognizing this that we feel motivated to try and improve the relationship by communicating in a different way.
Some labels maybe a hangover from the childhood days being how people attribute it to you by our children or grandparents or other pretty fingers equally to me.How does that stop with you and you find yourself using them not to harm yourself on others on many occasions. it’s important to remember that labels are abstractions and terribly accurate.
Why label yourself other people or any of in a negative way.The emotionally charged words may use negative feelings.That means to you.
And also are you in the direction of engaging in evidence in a divorce behavior ,that labels like to other people on the basis of one or two misdemeanors can cause friction .what really is what you are leaving them as they are can you really think about this fact their shoes might have ignited your perception about them but he or she just stood up all being happy.
Their whole identity.So next time if you are considering to label someone just think that it’s your perception about the person not exactly what the person might be as a whole.This is where lies the chance for you to bridge the gap when that person simply by changing your perception
about the person as a whole and having a clear conversation and understanding of the labels to ourselves.I am than that.I am using this term except from statements like this often however the rebirthing effect on the mind ,except that you behaved in a pathetic way or perform the task in a substandard fashion or did something bad.
Consider all this as a single action of course separate to what you did from yourself.Move on if you don’t mind can work on improvement.So it’s in your hand again and again telling that it’s in your hand to take charge of your own thoughts.They charge of your deeds and change it for your own betterment.And I’m sure you can do it.
You just have to keep trying and after a few tries.I’m sure you can do it.It’s doable.I have time it and I know many of my students have done too.